blog MDWK Magazine mompreneurs Mother's Day

Single Fil-Am moms on managing family and business — Asian Journal News

IT is usually stated that operating your personal business is like elevating another baby. Entrepreneurship is already an enormous enterprise, and for some mothers, there’s an additional layer of being a single mother or father on prime of all these obligations.

Juggling multiple roles, nevertheless, hasn’t detracted this group of mompreneurs from recognizing their experience and creating brands, whereas operating their households and attending to their youngsters’s needs.

“Being a single mom is not a handicap. In fact, that status comes with an inbuilt capacity for business success. Operating on a budget; Multitasking; Delegation; Management; and Problem-solving are both general skills for a successful mother and a successful entrepreneur,” writes success coach Toby Nwazor within the Huffington Submit.

In time for Mom’s Day this weekend, the Asian Journal spoke to 3 Filipina People about how they concurrently manage these 24/7 roles as business house owners and single mother and father.

Play on your strengths

Caroline Kostiuk, popularly referred to as Caroline Adobo Muffins, makes made-to-order desserts, resembling halo-halo tres leches and ube flan.

For Caroline Kostiuk, who has gained a sizable following with photographs of her cake decorations and family desk spreads underneath on-line persona Caroline Adobo, baking has been a life-long pastime. What started off as baking birthday desserts for shut family and associates was individuals putting orders. She now has a full-fledged enterprise where she makes customized desserts for any event and does particular pop-up events.

“My husband, who passed away 20 months ago, was always very supportive of my cake baking ventures and he was the first to cheer me on, especially when I would have cake pop-ups and events,” Kostiuk stated. “Now that I am a solo parent, I learn every day about myself: my capabilities and strengths, knowing your limits or when to ask for help. I think that’s essential for being an entrepreneur.”

Charina Vergara can recall when her entrepreneurial drive kicked in at an early age — from promoting snacks to classmates to making her first million at 23 as an account government for a travel company. When she separated from her husband and moved to the U.S. together with her two daughters in tow, she labored in gross sales and advertising for a media company and then a grocery chain, earlier than being let go last summer time.

This second led Vergara to make a transition as an actual property agent and then enterprise on her to open Titas of Manila restaurant in West Covina, California earlier this yr.

Charina Vergara just lately opened Tita’s of Manila, a Filipino comfort food restaurant in West Covina, California.

“After I was laid off, from July to December of last year, I just relaxed and took a much-needed break because I had been working since I was 17…Then I started baking and cooking for fun, which included developing a recipe for crinkles I was really proud of,” Vergara stated. “At the same time, I was going back to real estate because I am a licensed realtor and was asked to find a tenant to occupy this vacant space in West Covina, even for a short period…Long story short, my sister told me to get it, which was around December 29 and we closed the deal on December 31. I publicly posted that I took over the restaurant in January. We are in an exciting time wherein the Filipino food movement is gaining traction.”

Personal your single mom standing

While Fiona Hilario was a human assets specialist at the Philippine Veterans Affairs Office, she and her siblings considered starting a aspect enterprise centered around body waxing providers using natural products, which turned generally known as Lay Bare.

As we speak, Lay Naked has 50 company-owned and 74 franchised places across the Philippines. Hilario and her 16-year-old daughter Noelle moved to Southern California in 2012, where Hilario operates one location in Studio Metropolis and is general president and managing member of the franchising aspect of the business.

Hilario’s teenage daughter Noelle has expressed an interest in being involved in her mother’s business someday.

Hilario, who had her daughter at 28, stated that being a single mother shouldn’t be an obstacle to success. “One of the reasons I moved to the U.S. was because there was still a stigma around being a single parent back home in the Philippines,” she stated. “People here admire single mothers instead of being looked down on and treated like second-class citizens. The first step is getting out of that thinking that single moms are at a disadvantage.”

She added, “I actually feel that if I were married, I wouldn’t have been an entrepreneur and would have probably prioritized being a stay-at-home parent. Being by myself made me more ambitious to achieve something greater to make sure my daughter surpasses everything I have done myself.”

Vergara who just lately got here back to working for herself stated that it’s straightforward to dwell in the ‘what ifs’ and the previous. “I was already enjoying entrepreneurial life, but it was a setback because my marriage failed,” she stated. “But at the end of the day, I believe it was not a failure — it was actually a set-up for a comeback. I have come full circle after 12 years.”

“People ask why I don’t date. I’m in love with my kids and my family. I know what I want and I have goals and I am trying to really live up to my dreams,” she added.

Take charge of your schedule and put a system in place
For Hilario, prioritizing and dividing tasks is vital to operating things as clean as potential.  “Our business is very simple and doesn’t really require a lot of thinking. It’s more customer service and I can delegate most of the tasks,” she stated. “There would be weeks where I would go without a single day off but I think now it’s a matter of proper planning.”

Vergara shared, “Every day starts with bringing my daughter to school and going to the restaurant once rush hour settles down. When you work here, time is really fast and we have a slow period in the early afternoon from 2 to 4 p.m. and that’s when I do my realtor stuff. I used to work on my computer when I got home but now I don’t. I shut down everything…and that’s when I get to chat with my daughter about our day. I’m also more conscious about getting seven to eight hours of sleep daily.”

Focus on family relationships

Caroline Kostiuk and her sons Luri, Andre and Evan

At Kostiuk’s family, spending time collectively, particularly throughout dinnertime, has been a central a part of her family. Her sons at the moment are 19, 17 and 15 years previous and have grown up with an emphasis on being unbiased and contributing to the household.

“They knew from an early age that there are rules set at home: school and piano practice before video games, chores like washing dishes and taking out trash that every family members contribute to,” she stated. “We also make sure to have our meals together without outside distractions every single day. I think that helps us connect as a family. When I have longer work hours, we plan to have at least one meal together like breakfast before I head to work or a late dinner after.”

Hilario added that mother-daughter activities at the least as soon as every week and having open communication have helped strengthen their relationship as her daughter has gotten older.

“We’re inseparable and have a great relationship…[because] my daughter and I have spent so much time together. With her being an only child and me as a single parent, we kind of grew up together. We have an open relationship and she tells me anything. I’m lucky that she enjoys being with me. I’m not a strict parent and would rather lead by example. I tell her the consequences of actions but I leave her to make her own decisions. I’m not a helicopter parent and won’t hover over her. I know that she’s very responsible and mature.”

Every day check-ins are easy methods to keep continually up-to-date together with her daughters, Vergara stated.

“Every chance I get, I always say ‘I love you’ to my kids. I get my strength from my girls. They fuel me and keep me going because everything I’m doing right now is for them,” Vergara stated.

“America is a great place to live so you have to make the most out of what you have here.”

Make youngsters concerned in business
The three mompreneurs shared that their youngsters have naturally gravitated and voluntarily take part in their companies after faculty or during faculty breaks.

Kostiuk’s three sons assist out by “preparing baking equipment, measuring ingredients and most of all they come up with great cake flavor combinations. It usually starts out as their birthday cake and becomes part of my cake menu.”

For Hilario, her daughter Noelle was still a toddler in the course of the early days of Lay Naked and would have to tag alongside whereas she handed out fliers and promoted the business. Now that Noelle is 16, Hilario has entrusted her daughter with administrative and assistant work for the Studio City salon.

“I feel that she’s a very reliable assistant and she gets what I mean the first time I say it because she’s had the exposure since she was little,” Hilario stated. “She’s very active and actually her goal after college is to be able to take over and bring Lay Bare to greater heights by branching out of the United States and the Philippines. She’s very excited about running the business.”

Charina Vergara (center) together with her daughters Missy and Isabella working at their Filipino road meals stand at 626 Night time Market.

Just like her personal upbringing, Vergara instilled early on that her daughters must work in the event that they needed to buy something. “Being a single mom, the No. 1 hurdle is the financial aspect. I’ve trained them that you have to earn your keep,” she stated.

Last summer time, when she had a Filipino road food-inspired stall at 626 Night time Market, she employed her daughters, now 19 and 12 years previous, to deal with the sales and was stunned to watch their work ethic and appreciation for placing within the effort toward their monetary objectives.

Permit yourself to take a break
There’s fixed speak about find out how to obtain this concept of work-life stability, which many entrepreneurs have their own definitions of. While it is probably not feasible to take frequent vacations, finding methods to reset and have some solo time on a every day basis is necessary as operating each an organization and household can take its toll.

“I try to make time for myself any chance I get! May it be a simple matcha latte at a cafe or enjoying a treat with my sons. Also, cake-making for me is very therapeutic: the measuring and mixing put me in a calm zone while the decorating part lets me be more creative. So being around cakes in a way is time for myself,” Kostiuk stated.

Recognize your help system

Fiona Hilario, president and managing member of Lay Bare Franchising — a waxing salon that originated within the Philippines — and her daughter Noelle.

The three mompreneurs acknowledge that it takes a village to boost a family on prime of the calls for of the business. Thankfully, different family members, whether or not their very own mothers or sisters, have helped these moms along the best way.

“When we first moved to the U.S., we lived with my sister so that was a big plus and up to now, my sister helps out with picking my daughter up. Her school doubled up as a daycare so I had the opportunity to leave her until 6 p.m,” Hilario stated. “But once she turned 13 and it was legal to leave her, I started leaving her at home so that worked out for us and that taught her how to become very independent and responsible. That’s what we’ve done for the past seven years.”

“Vergara credit her mom, sister and brother-in-law for moving into the obligations as properly.

My brother-in-law is retired and I owe half of it to him as a result of he stood up as a physically current father to my youngsters. He is there emotionally and bodily by driving and choosing them up from faculty,” she famous. “My mom prepares meals for my daughter Missy still. All the support that I could ever think of, they are within reach. That is why I am thriving and flourishing because my wings are fully spread. I know I can always count on their support financially as well.”

Greatest advice for different single moms and mompreneurs
“Best advice I’ve received as a parent is to focus on the positive, relax and take it one day at a time. I find that also applies to having a business,” Kostiuk stated.

For Hilario, she stated, “What I’ve learned is that being a single mom strengthens your ‘why.’ Your why has to be bigger than your fears. First focus on your kids and find a passion that you think will change the world and everything will flow in from there.”

Vergara shared that “Keep praying, pray unceasingly…and with all your heart. We may not have a partner or a husband but God is with us. He is directing all our ways. Every good gift comes from Him. Make Him first place and you will go places.”

“If they have it in their heart, it is only a matter of time before they can achieve it. Just be patient — try and try and try. Never be afraid to fail because you learn more from your failures. Always put passion, excitement, fun and love to it,” she added.

Christina M. Oriel

Christina M. Oriel

Christina M. Oriel is the Managing Editor of the Asian Journal Weekly Newspapers.